I think, at last, all my ties to the past have already been cut, once and for all.
Coupled with the fact that I have extreme distaste for the current status of human nature, I am free to have a disregard for everything except the path I have to walk.
And I do not make my decision blindly either.
You may ask me to be proud of humanity. But instead of that, I would be willing to hear reasons why I should be.
You might say selflessness is a possible innate quality in people. In actual fact, this is just the opposite.
All living organisms, from the smallest of bacteria to humans, have the innate instinct to group together with the same kind and expand our numbers, while in the process decreasing that of others.
Humans are worse, as they have the mentality that they are superior in terms of intelligence to everyone else, and thus feel the need to satisfy their illusions of greatness over every other creature.
Take a look at how we enslave animals as a way of preservation, just because we think only we can truly take care of ourselves, and that we must remain the masters who govern the fate of other organisms.
The reason for this instinct, is because all creatures tend to fear what they cannot comfortably perceive, which is anything that they cannot accomodate into their comfort zones of well being and formed reality, and choose to ignore it and wait. This accomodation, or when they find excuses to cover up their actions in some crude justification, is what we often call 'understanding'.
Being 'superior', humans despise what they cannot have any amount of control over.
Preservation? For the greater good? To keep for future studies? Please. These are but excuses to make their actions of arrogant seem worth it, and to make them feel better.
So I suppose tigers and other organisms are not allowed to experiment with humans and cage them for studies? Or is this simply what a bully would do? Try to control every little thing they see, and ignore or sulk about what they cannot?
In train stations, children rush for seats, while parents help to fight for such comfort, all for the well being of their own kind or own self. This is another demonstration of their need for self-preservation.
And even now, I will wager that whatever I may have said here, I say this to anyone I know, they will just be shrug it off as delusional and unrealistic. All except one or two. But I cannot blame them. After all, this is to be expected, from experiences that I may have gone through.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Friday, May 21, 2010
Chapter 91: In His Company
True, no one is really around to share the experience and pain with. At least, no one who fully understands me.
I do notexpect them to try to. It is, after all, seemingly impossible for them to do so. How can I do so? Our perceptions and wills are different and unique.
Seeing is believing, after all. Whatever I experience and perceive, and if there is nothing I can do to change anything, I will simply let it be and absorb it into my will.
Whatever happens, as the flow of passage permits, I will stand there and take it all.
However, no one may understand me, but I know I am never alone.
Even when no one is around, no matter where I go, I am never by myself.
I may not be fully ready to take in his complete existence, but if The Lord does exist, then I need not be in solitude at all.
Everything may seem as harsh and cold as winter's winds, but all I have to do it look around.
Every blade of grass I see, every cloud I see in the skys, and even the trees... everything is a marvellous creation of his.
It is evidence, and a promise of his that he will never abandon me. The holy spirit resonates, and it is a gift from him.
Therefore, how can I be alone?
I do not care if he is almighty or not, or even when he lacks limitless power.
He is a friend who will never abandon our side, and that is enough to tide me through.
I cannot careless if he does rise again or not.
He is always around, and that is enough to chase away the biting winds.
Whether he rises or not, it will never matter, for to me, he is always near us.
I do notexpect them to try to. It is, after all, seemingly impossible for them to do so. How can I do so? Our perceptions and wills are different and unique.
Seeing is believing, after all. Whatever I experience and perceive, and if there is nothing I can do to change anything, I will simply let it be and absorb it into my will.
Whatever happens, as the flow of passage permits, I will stand there and take it all.
However, no one may understand me, but I know I am never alone.
Even when no one is around, no matter where I go, I am never by myself.
I may not be fully ready to take in his complete existence, but if The Lord does exist, then I need not be in solitude at all.
Everything may seem as harsh and cold as winter's winds, but all I have to do it look around.
Every blade of grass I see, every cloud I see in the skys, and even the trees... everything is a marvellous creation of his.
It is evidence, and a promise of his that he will never abandon me. The holy spirit resonates, and it is a gift from him.
Therefore, how can I be alone?
I do not care if he is almighty or not, or even when he lacks limitless power.
He is a friend who will never abandon our side, and that is enough to tide me through.
I cannot careless if he does rise again or not.
He is always around, and that is enough to chase away the biting winds.
Whether he rises or not, it will never matter, for to me, he is always near us.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Chapter 90: Season's Edge
I tried fighting against the majority for a change. Not that I would actually win for sure, but just for a change of pace. As simple as that. Instead of the norm, which included being supressed by the will of those who gather together, I thought it might be a nice change, and maybe a bit of an amusement for this tired spirit, to do so.
It was a nice change. But it really burnt me.
But some things just seem to affect my will. I welcome it, but at the same time, I hate the fickle hand of chronos.
I used to firmly believe that there is no right or wrong in this world. The so called 'justice' belongs to the strongest faction. The strength of people, and also dependant on how many have band together.
Power decides everything, and anything that says otherwise was nothing but an reminder of how people refuse to face the truth, and instead foolishly cling onto their naive ideals within their safety circle of comfort.
Maybe it was just the people whom I had come across that shaped such a will and reasoning.
Even after that small incident, few people actually wanted to make peace.
Even when I gave my thoughts out to those within a small discussion group, full of people whom I had just met in a club, there were people who disagreed and offered to show that I was wrong in that.
I cannot seem to decide.
I cannot decide between disregarding such actions as an extension of naive thoughts, or whether I was truly wrong and should rethink my ways.
This isn't quite like me. To me, I used to think that each decision was easy to make and that time would flow to completion no matter what.
That the flow of events and time would always exist unhindered.
What has happened to me? And to my will which I had faith in being unbreakable.
It was a nice change. But it really burnt me.
But some things just seem to affect my will. I welcome it, but at the same time, I hate the fickle hand of chronos.
I used to firmly believe that there is no right or wrong in this world. The so called 'justice' belongs to the strongest faction. The strength of people, and also dependant on how many have band together.
Power decides everything, and anything that says otherwise was nothing but an reminder of how people refuse to face the truth, and instead foolishly cling onto their naive ideals within their safety circle of comfort.
Maybe it was just the people whom I had come across that shaped such a will and reasoning.
Even after that small incident, few people actually wanted to make peace.
Even when I gave my thoughts out to those within a small discussion group, full of people whom I had just met in a club, there were people who disagreed and offered to show that I was wrong in that.
I cannot seem to decide.
I cannot decide between disregarding such actions as an extension of naive thoughts, or whether I was truly wrong and should rethink my ways.
This isn't quite like me. To me, I used to think that each decision was easy to make and that time would flow to completion no matter what.
That the flow of events and time would always exist unhindered.
What has happened to me? And to my will which I had faith in being unbreakable.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Chapter 89: Happy Meal
What is happiness to you? Quite an interesting question. I wonder how I can answer such a question.
To me, I guess happiness occurs when you put in all your vigour and energy into something you have never really tried before, and eventually you gain so much satisfaction, amusement, and discover things you never knew existed before, that you forget all the troubles and pain of the world you used to see.
To me, I guess happiness occurs when you put in all your vigour and energy into something you have never really tried before, and eventually you gain so much satisfaction, amusement, and discover things you never knew existed before, that you forget all the troubles and pain of the world you used to see.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)